2010年12月四六级阅读每日一练:第17篇

2010-08-17 00:00:00来源:网络

最后冲刺

2010年四六级备考手册:听力篇(更新中…)

2010年四六级备考手册:阅读篇(更新中…)

2010年四六级备考手册:写作篇(更新中…)

考前必备

四级写作高分工具:新概念3常见词汇句法

名师指导6月六级最后冲刺备考方法

四六级名师传授绝技:5个词拿下快速阅读

2010年6月六级听力考试场景词汇精要

六级听力长对话短期突破:从真题入手

2010年6月四六级考试真题答案点评
2010年6月四六级考试真题答案点评汇总


Unit Nine

Passage 1

How to Deal With Difficult People

In New York City one day, a businesswoman got into a taxi. Because it was rush hour and she was hurrying for a train, she suggested a route. "I've been a cabby(车夫) for 15 years!" the driver yelled. "You think I don't know the best way to go?"

The woman tried to explain that she hadn't meant to offend him, but the driver kept yelling. She finally realized he was too upset to be reasonable. So she did the unexpected. "You know, you're right," she told him. "It must seem dumb for me to assume you don't know the best way through the city. "

Taken aback, the driver flashed his rider a confused look in the rear-view mirror, turned down the street she wanted and got her to the train on time. "He didn't say another word the rest of the ride," she said, "until I got out and paid him. Then he thanked me. "

When you encounter people like this cab driver, there's an irresistible urge to dig in your heels. This can lead to prolonged arguments, soured friendships, lost career opportunities and broken marriages. As a clinical psychiatrist, I've discovered one simple but extremely unlikely principle that can prevent virtually any conflict or other difficult situation from becoming a recipe for disaster.

The key is to put yourself in the other person's shoes and look for the truth in what that person is saying. Find a way to agree. The result may surprise you.

Sulkers Steve's 14-year-old son, Adam, had been irritable for several days. When Steve asked why, Adam snapped, "Nothing's wrong! Leave me alone!" and stalked off to his room.

We all know people like this. When there's problem, they may sulk(生闷气) or act angry and refuse to talk.

So what's the solution? First, Steve needs to ask himself why Adam won't talk. Maybe the boy is worried about something that happened at school. Or he might be angry at his dad but afraid to bring it up because Steve gets defensive whenever he is criticized. Steve can pursue these possibilities the next time they talk by saying, "I noticed you're upset, and I think it would help to get the problem out in the open. It may be hard because I haven't always listened very • 58 •

well. If so, I feel bad because I love you and don't want to let you down. "

If Adam still refuses to talk, Steve can take a different tack: "I'm concerned about what's going on with you, but we can talk things over later, when you're more in the mood. "

This strategy allows both sides to win: Steve doesn't have to compromise on the principle that ultimately the problem needs to be talked out and resolved. Adam saves face by being allowed to withdraw for a while.

Noisy critics. Recently, I was counselling a businessman named Frank who lends to be overbearing(专横的) when he's upset. Frank told me that I was too absent-minded with money and that he shouldn't have to pay at each of our sessions. He wanted to be billed monthly.

I felt annoyed because it seemed Frank always had to have things his way. I explained that I had tried monthly billing, but it hadn't worked because some patients didn't pay. Frank argued that he had impeccable (无可挑剔的 ) credit and knew much more about credit and billing than I did.

Suddenly I realized I was missing Frank's point. "You are right," I said. " I'm being defensive. We should focus on the problems in your life and not worry so much about money. "

Frank immediately softened and began talking about what was really bothering him, which were some personal problems. The next time we met, he handed me a check for 20 sessions in advance!

There are times, of course, when people are unreasonably abusive and you may need to just walk away from the situation. But if the problem is one that you want solved, it's important to allow the other person to keep some self-esteem. There's nearly always a grain of truth in the other person's point of view. If you acknowledge this, he or she will be less defensive and more likely to listen to you.

Complainers. Brad is a 32-year-old Detroit chiropractor (按摩师) who recently described his frustration with a patient of his: "I ask Mr. Barry, 'How are you doing?' and he dumps out his whole life story-his family problems and his financial difficulties. I give him advice, but he ignores everything I tell him. "

Brad needs to recognize that habitual complainers usually don't want advice. They just want someone to listen and understand. So Brad might simply say : "sounds like a rough week, It's no fun to have unpaid bills, people nagging you, and this pain besides. " The complainer will usually run out of gas and stop complaining. The secret is not to give advice. Just agreeing and validating a person's point of view will make that person feel better.

Demanding friends. Difficult people aren't always -, angry or just complaining. Sometimes they are difficult because of the demands they place upon us. Maybe a friend puts you on the spot with a request to run an errand for him while he's out of town. If you have a crowded schedule, you may agree but end up angry and resentful. Or if you say no in the wrong way, your friend may feel hurt and unhappy. The problem is that, caught off guard, you don't know how to deal with the situation in a way that avoids bad feelings.

One method I've found helpful is "punting". You're punting when you tell the person you need to think about the request and that you'll get back about it. Say a colleague calls and pressures me to give a lecture at his university. I've learned to say, "I'm flattered that you thought of me. Let me check my schedule, and I'll call you back. "

This gives me time to deal with any feelings of guilt if I have to say no. Suppose I decide it is better to decline; punting allow me to plan what I will say when I call back, "I appreciate being asked," I might indicate, "but I find I'm over-committed right now. However, I hope you'll think of me in the future. "

Responding to difficult people with patience and empathy can be tough, especially when you feel upset. But the moment you give up your need to control or be right, the other person will begin relaxing and start listening to you. The Greek philosopher Epictetus understood this when he said nearly 2, 000 years ago, "If someone criticizes you, agree at once. Mention that if only the other person knew you well, there would be more to criticize than that !"

Real communication results from a spirit of respect for yourself and for the other person. The benefits can be amazing.

\

四级历年真题(2001-2009)


六级历年真题(2001-2009)

四六级考场必备词汇串讲-【0元领课】

四六级考场必备词汇串讲

四六级考前30天逆袭攻略-【0元领课】

四六级考前30天逆袭攻略

四六级考前30天备考规划,原价29.9元,限时免费领!

本文关键字:

2019年四六级考试真题回忆及解析

关注新东方在线 回复【四级真题】

更多资料
更多>>
更多内容

历年四六级考试真题汇总压缩包

关注新东方在线服务号回复【四级真题】

更多>>
  • 6月5日-13日

    四六级写作抢分必杀技

    高分审题技巧|写作万能公式|真题范文精讲 妙笔生花,写出考场高分作文!直播抽奖送Dior口红、罗技鼠标!

    价格 : ¥0元

    限报人数:10000人

    免费领取
  • 6月15日-24日

    10天刷完四六级高频词

    归类速记|拓展巩固|打卡赢奖 每天半小时,告别懒怂拖。看直播抽送罗技鼠标,坚持打卡赢神秘礼物!

    价格 : ¥0元

    限报人数:10000人

    免费领取
  • 考前重点

    四六级考前模拟测试

    模考自测+试题解析+成绩排名=轻松过级! 免费领课,参与模考排名得壕礼!

    价格 : ¥0元

    限报人数:10000人

    免费领取
更多公开课>>
更多>>
更多资料